Curryous

Country Mouse City Mouse

Mon, 26 Mar 2007 05:34:52 GMT

I had a wonderful opportunity to travel to Chonburi Province (East of Bangkok) with the Aunt and Uncle of my Thai friend. We stopped at a beach town called Pattaya and ate lunch at a restaurant built in the jungle with streams and waterfalls all around.

Na Ni (the aunt) has three orchards in the country with mangostein, rambutin, and dulian trees. We picked and ate fruit all day and planted a few trees. There are so many varieties of fruit in Thailand, something is always in season and you never get a fruit that is mealy or unripe. The mangostein and rambutin are very sweet. The dulian is stinky and tastes like ass in my humble opinion. The fried dulian is okay.

In the evening, I had my hair washed and styled for just over $1. This included a 10 minute head massage. After, we were treated to a wonderful dinner with fresh seafood (fish, crab, shrimp, squid), curries, and other wonderful dishes who's names I'll never remember and who's ingredients I can't begin to guess.

On Sunday we went to a famous show where the men, transsexuals, and transgendered dress in amazing costumes and lip synch to songs from America, Thailand, Korea, Japan, etc. They were very tall, thin, and beautiful.

Some observations:

1) Country people are very dark. I was surprised to discover that many Thai people whiten their skin. What a crazy world it is. Here I am paying $25 to get a spray on country tan, and Thai people are doing everything they can to get whiter!

2) There are dogs everywhere. They roam in packs and alone. Some seem to be attached to families, but are not allowed in the house and are so skinny and scruffy, I found myself carrying pocketfuls of treats to give out. At first I thought there were lots of dead dogs - fortunately, they were just sleeping (at least that's what I was told). The dogs here will sleep in the sun. I guess it really isn't much cooler in the shade!

3) The Thai people love me. Even with the communication barrier. They are all very impressed with the few Thai words I know (I am a good mimic). And they love the fact that I love their food. Also, I've been told that they like that I smile and laugh a lot. They are very proud and like to show me their houses, gardens, and family pictures. It is quite endearing and I have to say, for the most part, I've really enjoyed their company and am glad they feel the same. Funny enough, my anxiety about small talk is non-existent here. I chat and laugh with everyone - no sweat. I wonder why that is?

4) Just as I suspected, time is completely subjective. Before the trip I asked "How many hours to the gardens in Chanburi" and was told 3 hours. It took us 7. On the way back, I had a minor melt down. I am not a car person and with the IBS and spotty toilets, 7 hours looked like an eternity. But, you cannot rush Thai people. They are very much about the journey, not the destination.

Traveling Fat

Mon, 26 Mar 2007 05:08:02 GMT

I'm posting the negative post before the positive post, so if you don't want to read anything negative or weight-related, skip this one.

This weekend was a tough one for me. I took a lovely trip to the country with Sai's Aunt and Uncle, who speak very little English. I know that no one there meant me harm, but my weight was a huge issue/joke. They even made me compare bellies with a pregnant woman. I had no idea how to respond. If this would have happened in the USA, I would have told them to f' off. But, seeing as I had to spend another 6 hours in the car with them, I suffered in silence. I know it shouldn't have let it hurt me, but I was and am totally crushed.

I am embarrassed to be at this weight in a country where no one is fat (it's not so hot in my own country either). My self-esteem is really hurting. I've been fit to chubby throughout the years, but right now I am obese. I am wearing all of my past hurts and unhappiness as a giant fat suit. When I look at myself in the mirror, I don't even recognize myself. I am ashamed.

I was planning on heading to Krabi, a beach near Phuket today. Part of me didn't want to go in the first place. I didn't want to deal with the stares. I am so large and so white, I stick out like a sore thumb. When I got to the airport this morning, they wanted to charge me $120 more for having an overweight bag. Oh the irony. This was the the last straw for me(there were many more straws before this, but I don't want this blog to be a tyranny of negativity). I booked a ticket home and I leave tomorrow.

I'm stopping in San Francisco in the hopes that some time with friends who love me, fat suit and all, will cheer me up.

And let me tell you, I will never say "Wow he/she has gotten fat. How could they have let themselves go?" There was no "letting go" about it. It has been a claw and fist fight for my sanity and health over the past year. One that I won't give up.

Food-gasm

Fri, 23 Mar 2007 06:51:54 GMT

The food here deserves its own blog post. I can't begin to describe to you how delicious it is. The flavors are complex, yet most of the food I've tried seems very healthy. Fresh herbs, spices, vegetables, and fruits cover the table and the dishes range from sweet to savory, with every combination in between.

Here are some of my favorite dishes and foods so far: sugar cane cooked with a pork dumpling (you eat the dumpling and suck the juice out of the sugar cane); a tree leaf that is succulent and slightly tart that you can use to deflect the heat in some of the dishes or you can just eat by itself; tamarind fruit; mango and rice with fresh coconut milk and fried soy bean nuts; cabbage, boc choy, basil, and fresh water fish boiled on the table in a savory broth; fried banana; pad thai (very different from the states); crab fried rice and; green sweet ice drink (who knows what this is!?).

There's so much more! Did I mention they fresh squeeze the orange juice? It is heaven! I think that's part of why Sai's family likes me so much. If you are Thai, you are a natural born foodie. And you guys know I love food!

It occurs to me that I should have been taking pictures of the dishes I liked. I'll try and do that for the rest of the trip.

I am no longer "Farung"

Fri, 23 Mar 2007 06:38:16 GMT

I officially surpassed foreigner status last night. I met all of Sai's family and we had so much fun they've adopted me and given me a Thai name: Bai Plu (rhymes with blue). Ruth is very hard for them to pronounce and makes them giggle. My Thai name is the name of an edible tree and is considered a very cute name.

The aunties argued over who got to take me around today. Na Ni picked me up at 7am and took me to her school. She teaches 3rd grade. I got to observe class and hear the principal give a presentation. They taught me how to say some words and write my name in Thai. The kids did a song and dance for me.

The kids were so darn cute with their curiosity. They probably haven't seen anything this white ever! *lol* The entire school starts with a prayer to buddha. The classes are lively and laid back. I don't know if it is because I don't know the language, but they all seem to talk at once.

After school, Auntie 2(I can't pronounce her name)took me for an 1 and 45 minute massage. This treat only cost me about $9. In Thai massage, you wear a loose fitting outfit and they use all parts of their body (feet, elbows, knees, hands) to work out the kinks. It was heaven. They start the massage by washing your feet and end it with a nice cup of sweet tea.

I almost forgot, I got a really good laugh from Sai's family by pointing to a Koi pond and yelling "look at the huge Koi!" Koi in Thai means dick. ROFLMAO!!!

Tomorrow Na Ni and Na Tom are driving me three hours into the country to plant seeds at the family orchard. I'll get to see places most foreigners never see. There is supposed to be a lovely waterfall and a restaurant/house boat with delicious seafood. They don't speak much English, and I speak maybe 5 words of Thai. Should be interesting! I'm taking a roll of toilet paper just in case the latrines are lacking as many are in this country.

Craziness

Thu, 22 Mar 2007 01:13:46 GMT

Thai people park their cars wherever they want. If they are blocking someone in, they just leave their car in neutral and the other person will push the car out of the way if they want to get out. *boggle*

And you know how in the states, depending on where you are, the cars rule the road or the people rule the road? It is a total free-for all here. First of all, the motorcycles and tuk-tuks (they look like golf-carts) veer in and out of traffic at mad speeds. And does anyone wear a helmet? No! Second, there's no such thing as merging. You just get in where you fit in. But the craziest thing is that I've yet to see an accident and no one honks their horn. Even in the worst traffic jams! And don't even get me started on being a pedestrian. I expect to be hit at any moment. *lol*

The shady side of Thailand

Thu, 22 Mar 2007 01:04:35 GMT

I knew prostitution was accepted here, but I had no idea just how prevalent and easy it was! My friends and I went to a go-go bar this week and all of the girls were "for sale." You could take your pick for $50 American for the night and even take your girl home with you. For $18 you could have her at the club for the night and they have bedrooms upstairs. All of the women were very beautiful. I was a little uncomfortable with the whole thing at first. But compared to American strip-clubs, these women are sober, can touch you, and seem healthy/happy. Of course, who knows how they really feel. Thai people tend to always look happy. Sai tells me it is part of the culture.

Don't laugh, but the girl I picked (just for a song) turned out to be a former man. She was tinier than any guy I've ever seen! I'll try and post the picture I took with my camera phone when I get back.

Did I mention how tiny the women (and men!) are here? I feel like a giant. I can't buy any of the clothes at my current weight. But, it sure is nice to feel tall! I think everyone is skinny because it is so damn hot. The air actually weighs something, I swear! I can really feel the extra weight now that I'm here and I'm even more motivated to lose it.

Last night I headed to the burbs to hang with Sai (my friend Art's wife). Out here, you hardly seen any foreigners. I got to go to her university and today I'm getting my hair straightened (only $50!) and getting a massage.

One last thing, I know I've mentioned the food before - but it is so incredible. We went to this place last night wear you dip fresh veggies, sushi, sashimi, etc. in a boiling broth. On top of that, they wheel around a dim-sum cart. *drool* All three of us gorged for under $20. And the great thing is - most of it is really healthy! If you visit, be sure to try the duck feet. YUM!

Dance, Dance, Revolution

Mon, 19 Mar 2007 02:44:57 GMT

We went dancing Saturday night. I have to say, the clubs in Thailand rival those in NYC and SF. The club we set up base at was along a street lined with clubs and outdoor seating. The inside of the club was uber-shiek: white leather furniture, chandeliers, multiple levels with different styles of music. Crazy enough, the music is very current and the DJs are as good as any I've seen in the states. Too bad my feet were blistered. I spent most of the night chair dancing.

Almost everyone in the club was Thai. It's nice to have a Thai hook-up here so I get to see more of where the locals hang out. I ended up getting into a deep, political conversation with a guy from Portugal who lives in China. It has been an eye-opener to hear how others view the USA. I spend a lot of time apologizing and trying to convince people that many Americans did NOT vote for Bush.

First Impressions

Mon, 19 Mar 2007 02:22:16 GMT

I've been in Thailand 3 days now. Talk about Lost in Translation! I'm surprised at how inaccurate the guidebooks have been. Most of the Thai people I've met speak only a smattering of English and while all are polite, I am informed that most Thai people do not really like "Farung" or foreigners. I am also stunned by the extreme poverty I've seen. There is a stark contrast between the tin roofed hovels housing Thai familiesand the tall, shiny hotels serving foreigners.

I've spent the last couple of days walking through the neighborhoods, going to the malls, and eating Thai food. It is so hot and humid here that my sunglasses often fog up. The food is amazing and you can get a bowl of noodles or duck and rice for 25 cents on the street. The sit down restaurants are more expensive, but I still have yet to pay more than $4 for a meal. The fruit here is the best I've ever had and is always ripe and juicy.

Once my feet heal, I'll do more sight-seeing. I am also going to spend some time in the Bangkok burbs visiting with my friend's wife. Did I mention I am caught in the middle of a love triangle? My friend is staying in town with his mistress while his wife teaches at a University just outside of Bangkok. Both the mistress and his wife have plead their cases to me and want me to get Arthur to choose them. ACK!

Arriving in Thailand

Fri, 16 Mar 2007 04:11:12 GMT

After 23 hours of traveling, I land in Bangkok at 11pm. Friendly faces and warm moist air greet me. Immigration is a breeze and within 15 minutes of landing, I've found my old college drinking buddy. Draped on his arm is a beautiful, young Thai woman. She is not his wife.

We taxi into town and I'm surprised to see that, so far, Bangkok could be any major city in the US. After getting settled, we head out for some food and beer. Despite the late hour, food sellers line the streets.

We end up at a place called The Colliseum - a throwback to old Vegas. Inside a talent show with lip synching, dancing, and strange acts is on the front stage. We are greated warmly and soon have beer and hot steaming plates in front of us. I feel like I'm caught in one of those asian tv game shows. The music is bumping and mostly English, but the acts and the people are all Thai.

I have a total blast and collapse happily in bed with a full stomach at around 3am.